Any Day

Any day

Albuquerque, New Mexico

2015

As usual, I drove passed the office building, make a left into the parking lot. As usual, I parked the car facing east, the Sandia Mountains. Some days, I can see beautiful pink and light blue colored sky. It is the blessing of living in the high desert. We do not have clouds all the time. When they come, it is always dramatic.

I walked the usual path towards the building. I swiped my card and got in. Some days, there will be a worker next to me. We will make some small talk, like the weather or payday. Some days, it seems that that is the real reason why I park my car there and swipe the my badge, payday and paycheck.

Many times, I try to cheer myself up. Hey Ben, look, you are better than many people. You have a house, a nice family, a car and a job. Remember the AMERICAN DREAM? You have it!

That self talk will last for a few hours, or even shorter. Just like when I return from a vacation, I am so geared up for a good work, with my gas tank for of recharged energy. But it only takes one patient encounter to see the energy evaporate.

I got to the lobby, waved to the early birds at the check in counter. Some times, we also have a short small talk. Then I punched in a code to get into the office area. Then I used my key to enter my office. Another day.

Another day starts with paper work. There is always a stack of paper in front of my nurse. We came up with a way to deal with it. The ones to the right are the urgent one. The ones to the left can wait. And to the left of those papers, at the end of the counter is the waste basket, a big one. And to the left of the big waste basket is the bigger blue recycle bin. It swallows the papers that I cannot trash openly, meaning, it has patient information. And next to the blue bin is the multitasking machine for faxing and copying. Two tasks that are essential survival. When they are not working, you can see the extra line of wrinkle in my forehead, or on my nurse’s forehead, followed by a sigh.